ElectionsVote “A two-pound turkey and a 50-pound cranberry. That’s Thanksgiving dinner on Three-Mile Island.” — Johnny Carson I’ve noticed a disturbing lack of Global Warming Hysteria(more..)


ElectionsVote When I was a kid in school and growing up, no one ever told me about distraction. Well. If they did, I wasn’t paying attention. I suppose if I were to appoint one supreme mortal enemy of mine ov(more..)


ElectionsVote “Happiness is having a large, caring, close-knit family. In another city.” — George Burns Every Christmas, we all get that relatively new cultural phenomenon in the mail — the(more..)


ElectionsVote “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family. In another city.”— George Burns   CAPTION: My brother-like substance, Joe. (from a police artist sketch.) My (more..)


ElectionsVote “Beware of the man whose God is in the skies.”— George Bernard Shaw If someone passed a petition outlawing Christmas, I’d probably sign it. I’m not being a Grinch, eithe(more..)


ElectionsVote At the dawn of the 21st century, Jair Coelho made a fortune by acquiring the sole government contract to provide around 22,000 boxed meals a day for Rio de Janeiro’s prison population. (PHOTO(more..)


ElectionsVote “The snow goose need not bathe to make itself white. Neither need you do anything but be yourself.”— Lao-Tse Except for the pot smoking, in Roy Michael Moore, I have a kindred spiri(more..)


ElectionsVote “Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through a blizzard.” — Jeff Valdez   (PHOTO CAPTION: Ruth Newhall and her black office alley cat, Ma(more..)


ElectionsVote “The polar bear and the tiger cannot fight.”— Freud  So I saw four bears in the woods the other day. Best as I can calculate, that’s one better than Goldilocks. All my l(more..)


ElectionsVote “Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.” — Woody Allen I was searching for something on my computer and stumbled upon something I wrote about 13 years ago. It (more..)