ElectionsVote Okay, so every once in a while we have a misstep here at the SCV Beacon. This week’s Boston Report is delayed and will hopefully show up later today. But in the meantime, we do want to draw you (more..)

ElectionsVote “Last time I tried to make love to my wife, nothing was happening. So I said to her, ‘What’s the matter? You can’t think of anybody either?”— Rodney Dangerfield &n(more..)

ElectionsVote “The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.”— Gloria Leonard We all wear many hats and one of mine is historian. I used to teach the history of the Santa Clarita Va(more..)

ElectionsVote “In heaven, there ain’t no beer. That’s why, we drink it here.” — from the hit polka song A while back, the Miller Brewing Company aired a new TV spot showing three youn(more..)

ElectionsVote “I propose getting rid of conventional armaments and replacing them with reasonably priced hydrogen bombs that would be distributed equally throughout the world.”— Idi Amin  Am(more..)

ElectionsVote “Patriotism is the veneration of real estate above principles.”— George Jean Nathan  Do you know what the Santa Clarita Valley needs? Well. Besides fewer yuppies. SClarnopoly(more..)

ElectionsVote “America — a country that has leapt from barbarism to decadence without touching civilization.”— Ted Morgan Cripes. It’s our birthday. If I wanted a stern lecture about (more..)

ElectionsVote “I hate small towns because once you’ve seen the cannon in the park there’s nothing else to do.” — Lenny Bruce Every once in awhile, an out-of-towner will curl up his or(more..)

ElectionsVote (NOTE FROM AUTHOR: Been hyperbusy putting out the new multimedia website, foofmagazine.com. Check it out. It launched yesterday. In the meantime, here’s a column I penned a few years ago. If my (more..)

ElectionsVote “I would have made a good pope.”—Richard M. Nixon, who then, later, changed his name to John Boston AND… “Democracy is the art of running the circus from the monkey ca(more..)